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Filed under Funny Stuff

A Timeline for Waiakea’s Future: 2011-2111

2011: Nothing has changed. Yet.

2012: Students who, banking on the end of the world, decided not to study for Mr. Mau’s semester final are forced to face the consequences when the world, in fact, does not end. Mau gives a record number of F’s.

2020: The BIIF adopts hockey as the newest interscholastic sport. The WHS Hockey team, coached by Mr. Anderson, captures the state title.

2024: Gordon Mau is elected Governor of the State of Hawaii. He agrees to give 30 million dollars to Waiakea High for a campus expansion and the dedication of a new building to serve as the Korean Culture Center of Hawaii.

2030: The school expansion concludes with the construction of the 30-story Z building. School officials, having exhausted the alphabet, are not sure what they are going to name new buildings.

2031: School officials decide to name new buildings after animals. Muskrat building is constructed.

2045: Hilo High finally closes. The newly liberated students swear their allegiance to Waiakea.

2047: After the school administration attempts to replace security guards with robots, Aunty Pua prevents this measure when she roundhouse kicks three robots all the way to Pahoa. The robot plan is scrapped. Aunty Pua gets a raise.

2062: The 50th Reunion of the Class of 2012 gets out of hand and results in the destruction of Llama building. Wealthy members of the class pay for the damage out of pocket.

2074: Waiakea alumnus Francis Sakai-Kawada (Class of 2009), aged 83, is honored for painting his one-millionth banner in a small ceremony outside of E103. He continues to spend his afternoons in E103.

2110: Waiakea High finally meets State Standards.

2111: Mrs. Kobayashi retires after over a century of service.

Disclaimer: This article is intended to be humorous.  We mean no offense to any individuals mentioned in this article.  If you do take issue with any of the content presented here, please contact any member of the Ka Leo Staff and we will edit this article accordingly.

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